Accidious

Hey you look like!

You know that one guy? The one with the hair? And the, uh, what’s it, the baby baby oh? Ah that’s right! Justin Bieber. I think, even if you’re living under a rock, you’ve heard of Justin Bieber. He is everywhere. And I’d argue that (before he cut it) he was most known for his hair. No, not his music. His hair. If you’re going to impersonate Justin Bieber, you mostly just have to get the hair down. Everything else comes naturally.

I happen to sport a similar hairstyle to his trademark flippy hair look. Not even the same, just similar. And I’m not even trying to emulate him! I mean, it’s not even a particularly original hairstyle. It’s just a regular shaggy, teenage boy hairstyle. But ever since Justin Bieber became ridiculously famous, any hairstyle of that type automatically qualifies as a Justin Bieber hairstyle.

So, as you might guess, I get told that I look like Justin Bieber. It has significantly died down (I’m guessing because he chopped his hair off) but for a time it was almost constant. But here’s the thing: what is the point of telling me I look like Justin Bieber? Let’s go over the two scenarios that pop up and why they’re stupid.

Scenario 1: “Hey, you look like Justin Bieber!” What the hell do I even say to this? Thank you? I know? Obviously I know who Justin Bieber is and obviously I know what I look like. I think I am capable of making the connection. But THANK YOU for pointing it out nonetheless.

Scenario 2: “Has anyone ever told you you look like Justin Bieber?” No, congratulations, you are the first person to make the painfully obvious observation that I’m sporting a similar hairstyle to the Biebs! Here’s your trophy! You’re a winner! Except actually, yes, plenty of people have told me that before you. And once again, what do I even say to this? Yes, better luck next time? Seriously now guys.

As you can see, there’s no reason to tell me I look like Justin Bieber. I don’t mind when friends do it (which they barely ever do), because they’re just kidding around. But when I’m at work and customers ask/tell me that, they can gtfo. I don’t know you random customer! We aren’t friends! So stop trying to be buddy buddy with me while simultaneously trying to make a cultural reference. You’re just embarrassing yourself and annoying me. But mostly annoying me. So knock it off.

Posted on: April 24, 2011 — 3 Comments

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