Sex and Violence
Which is worse for a child to see: Someone being shot to death or two people of appropriate age having consensual sex?
I bet that a lot of parents would say that the sex scene is worse. I can’t remember how many times my parents would tell me to cover my eyes during a movie, because some girl was topless (turns out I didn’t like boobs anyway) or things were getting a little steamy between the protagonist and his attractive female sidekick. But I can’t recall a time when they told me to cover my eyes because something was too violent.
Granted we didn’t watch Reservoir Dogs as a family or anything like that, but in movies like Halloween and Friday the 13th, it was fine for me to watch the victims get killed. Boobage on screen? Cover your eyes. And when parents are buying video games for their kids, the number one seller is Call of Duty. It has an M rating, but since there’s no sex, it’s acceptable. I actually rung up a woman who said, “I know it’s a war game and there’s violence, but I’m okay with that. As long as there’s no sex.”
Sorry, what? You’re okay with your son playing a game in which he kills people constantly, but you don’t want him to be exposed to, gasp!, sex? In my opinion, that’s absolutely ridiculous.
Why is it more acceptable to be exposed to violence but not sex? Sex is natural and, chances are, your son is going to be having it one day. Maybe if he’s lucky, someday soon. But he’s probably not going to be killing anyone. And if he is, video games and movies are the least of your problems. So really, why do you care if he sees something risque in a video game, movie or TV show? I bet you he’s looking at porn online anyway.
Now, I’m not going to say that we should start showing tons of sex in media and censor all violence. Frankly I don’t really believe that violent media makes violent kids. But likewise I don’t think that sexual media makes sexual kids. Honestly, I was introduced to pornography by my friends when I was 12 and I have been exposed to sexual media ever since. I’m still a virgin. Believe it or not, seeing people have sex doesn’t make you run out and recklessly have sex with the first disease-ridden hooker you can find. So why is it that kids can’t be exposed to anything sexual? Because it’s taboo? It’s dirty? It’s too mature for them?
That’s all bullshit. Kids need to learn about sex eventually, and skirting around the subject while trying to shelter them from it isn’t going to accomplish anything. Also, telling them not to have sex until they’re married isn’t going to accomplish anything.
We need to become more comfortable with the idea that sex is completely natural and normal (at least in American society). We also need to be more comfortable with the idea that kids are going to have sex and telling them not to isn’t going to stop them. We need to explain what sex is, what can happen and how they can take precautions to prevent negative consequences.
Frankly, we need to grow up.
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Hello, my name's Josh and I might be a hipster (you decide!). I've been blogging and designing in some form for the past eight or so years and I think I'm starting to get the hang of it (once again, you decide!). I love indie music, coming of age stories, sarcasm, video games, and aesthetics. At the moment I'm working part-time and going to college with hopes of being a web designer. 
Posted by Emsz — Sunday, February 27th 2011
Honestly, I don’t understand it either. People here kicked up a huge shit storm when one of the public broadcasting networks wanted to show deep throat on a Saturday. Well, technically on a Sunday, since they showed it at two in the morning.
Not telling your kid about sex is not going to make them have it any less.
Posted by gem — Sunday, February 27th 2011
America was founded because people left England for being too racy. England. Where the Queen lives and they drink tea and shit. We’re obviously doomed to be prudes.
Granted, Europe as a whole is a lot racier than us. They have naked people in like every ad ever and nobody bats an eyelid. That would never in a million years fly here. Sadly. Sex is awesome.
Posted by Clem — Monday, February 28th 2011
It’s also worth noting that abstinence-only education has backfired miserably, so it seems silly to not teach kids about these things. Obviously you should set some context if you let your kids watch movies with sexual content, but I don’t really see what the big deal is either.
Posted by Emsz — Wednesday, March 2nd 2011
@Gem: Not true. Definitely not true :P While, yes, there is probably more exposed flesh in some of the ads, there is not a lot more nakedness, honestly!
Posted by Stephanie — Tuesday, March 8th 2011
I’m going to guess that you’re American. And even though I don’t flinch when seeing pornography, I’m certainly not used to seeing it. I think it’s really just America. Because my boyfriend said that in Europe, he saw ads out in public with exposed nipples.
And like Gem said, it’s a pity. Sex >> violence. Coming from a girl who practices martial arts too. :P
Posted by Emsz — Friday, March 11th 2011
So, I’m guessing this would be completely out of the question in America?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JxBfaFotxTc
(It’s a commercial for a yoghurt/milk based drink that claims to improve the immune system. I think you’ll find it amusing, although you see more detail when it’s actually on television)